The Best Lies Money Can Buy

Remember a couple of months ago when the Broad Foundation and the Gates Foundation teamed up to form a $60 million public relations campaign? What that money is being spent on is now coming out.

First there was the "study" by ETS that claimed the majority of Americans are in favor of NCLB. Here is the "question" they used to get those results:

“The No Child Left Behind Act provides federal funds for school districts with poor children in order to close achievement gaps. It also requires states to set standards for education and to test students each year to determine whether the standards are being met by all students. In addition, No Child Left Behind provides funding to help teachers become highly qualified. It also provides additional funding and prescribes consequences to schools that fail to achieve academic targets set by their state. Based on this statement and anything else you may have heard, would you say that you have a favorable or an unfavorable opinion of the No Child Left Behind Act?”

For a great in-depth analysis see Schools Matter.

Now comes a new "study" from the Hoover Institution gleefully claiming they got the same results. No big surprise, they used basically the same question:

As you may know, the No Child Left Behind Act requires states to set standards in math and reading and to test students each year to determine whether the standards are being met. This year, Congress is deciding whether to renew the No Child Left Behind Act. What do you think Congress should do?

For a good laugh, here's the "alternate" version:

As you may know, federal legislation requires states to set standards in math and reading and to test students each year to determine whether the standards are being met. This year, Congress is deciding whether to renew this federal legislation. What do you think Congress should do?

I would like to propose a new question for the next study. What kind of results do you think they'd get with this one:

"As you know, the No Child Left Behind Act represents the largest federal intrusion onto states' rights in the history of the United state, is most likely unconstituional, allows the federal govt. to mandate 100% of what is being taught in schools while only picking up 7% of the cost, and is opposed by over 80% of current and former educators, do you think Congress should renew this federal legislation?

I haven't tweaked any of the "experts" over at Joanne Jacobs in awhile. I think I'll go drop this question on them.

The Countdown Is On

As of tomorrow I'll have only 2 weeks left to my summer vacation. I've got lots of goofing off to do, plus I'll be hosting the carnival again soon. Oh summer, there were so many things I wanted to do but didn't.

I wanted to go see the Meteor Crator outside of Flagstaff, AZ. It would be about a 1200 drive so I would LOVE to fly out there, spend a day or so, and fly back. I could get plenty of pictures I could use in my classroom.

I haven't read much this summer. Last summer it seems like I spent the entire time reading, this year it feels like I've done nothing but home improvement projects. So far we've remodeled our bedroom and bathroom. We also built a pad to place the hottub on, as well as installed 2 bi-fold doors in the place of regular doors in our house, one to our bathroom and one to the laundry room.

Next up will be a deck around the hottub, as well 2 more outdoor speakers, these 2 closer to the hottub.

But before then I have some serious goofing off to do.

The 129th Edition of the Carnival of Education

I've received what seems like a TON of entries for this week's carnival, and I'm going to do my best to use all of them for this week's carnival, so here goes.

My Daily Reads

When he's not shamelessly promoting his book, Learn Me Good (available from Amazon, Barnes and Noble and Lulu), Mr. Teacher is the walking epitome of studliness at his school. At least that's how new (to me) blogger Fractions speak louder than nerds views male teachers. Funny, the women at my school must have missed that directive. As an added bonus Mr. Teacher links to other male teachers who blog. You can also take his >YouTube Challenge, (is that Styx's Too Much Time On My Hands I hear in the background?). A winner will be drawn from the names of those who comment on his videos (*cough, Mike in Texas, cough*)and will receive a free Learn Me Good t-shirt.

If you like to speed AND you're a resident of the state of Virginia, be careful out there. According to the EdWonks Virginia governor Tim Kaine wants to put massive fines on speeders, at least those who are from Virginia. If you have an out of state license you pay a more modest fine.

Once again NYC Educator takes on the KIPPers with his comments on the drill and kill methods to meet minimum standards they employ. On a side note, wouldn't it be great if we could pick and choose our students and demand they spend extra time in school?

The Science Goddess is getting a PhD and preparing for her upcoming role as an instructional coach. This week she looks at research into teaching and learning. I'm not much for charts and graphs but anyone who refers to herself as a goddess is OK in my book.

If you like movie trivia be sure to check out the Movie Madness every Monday over at A Shrewdness of Apes

Around The Blogs

The Repairman presents A Hidden Third Factor That Influences Math Scores? posted at RepairKit. In this post he examines factors that may influence Math scores as well as solutions to these problems.

When it comes to Math, what's more important Thinking or Knowing asks Kim over at Kim's Play Place.

Frequent Carnival contributor IB a Math Teacher Student-Teachers With Disabilities over at 3σ → Left examines the case of a student teacher with disabilities, in this case depression and social anxiety. Should this person be allowed to work with students when her professor feels she one of the most negative people he's ever encountered?

New blogger In 2 The Trenches is excited about the new school year, and has a bunch of links to Google Apps that teachers can use. Be nice to her, she's a carnival virgin.

Matthew K. Tabor is seeking teacher opinions on this essay from a teaching applicant. There will be two followups for this post.

I'm always a sucker for any presenter who brings snacks, so Stephanie over at LeaderTalk suggests you Feed Your Teachers. She also offers of a list of positive traits for leaders to have. If you bring cinnamon rolls to my school I'll be yours forever, Stephanie.

Somehow I missed this great post, also about leadership, by Scott over at Dangerously Irrelevant. Scott invited bloggers and readers to write about effective school technology leadership.

Jose Vilson remembers When ... school was a little different. I have to ask, does that make him craaaaazy? Possibly!

Another blog new to me is Washington Teacher and judging by the picture on his blog, Washington must be a beautiful state. His submission is about a class action lawsuit against alleged NEA retirement kickbacks

Ryan over at I Thought a Think blogs about the snazzy new NCTM newsletter, and apparently has a Man crush on Skip Fennell. Is it


Tim has been reading up on John Dewey who felt that education should be about the here and now, and not a preparation for something (like standardized tests).

Cheating should not be allowed in any form writes Darren of Right on the Left Coast: Views From a Conservative Teacher. Darren examines the cheating scandal involving an Oakland charter school known for placing large numbers of students in college.

Chanman is taking the sans-union plunge as he resigns from the California Teacher's Association. Those of us who teach in Texas are often perplexed by powerful teacher's unions (you know those ones Rod Paige compares to terrorist organizations) as here in Texas teachers' unions have no power whatsoever in regards to salaries, working conditions or teacher assignments.

A good story can capture the attention of students, and History Is Elementary loves to tell this story about Washington crossing the Delaware, and NO! I won't tell you how it ends.


As a teacher who has researched the No Child Left Behind law and its supporters, I'm not a big fan of the Broad (rhymes with road) Foundation, and neither is Norm of Education Notes Online.

Are we doing kids a favor when we praise them, wonders Mr. Pullen. The results of a study he read may surprise you.


I've written numerous times about how I feel administrators ignore the opinions and ideas of teachers, and The Tempered Radical agrees with me. His submission for this weeks carnival is entitled Draconian and Dysfunctional. . .

Teachers are among the most trusted Professions writes Charles over at Trusted Advisor. Nurse and doctors are also high on the list.

Money management should be a family affair and who would know that more than the Millionaire Mommy Next Door. Her entry suggests ways to involve your children in the money management process.

Life can be tough teaching in UK secondary schools writes Scenes From The Battleground. He has a nice guide to his blog with a quick links to past posts.

Donna (a.k.a. Ms Whatsit) wants to know what you're doing to prepare for the first day of school. The first day? I'm still working on suppressing memories of last year!

Those little monsters should learn to appreciate what they have, says Alvaro over at Brain Fitness Blog. Actually his post is called Mental Training for Gratitude and Altruism, but you get the point.

The arts are being left behind says Riley Central, and one test score should not be used to judge an entire year's success. Amen, Riley, amen.

Connie is one talented cutie and even manages to win over grumpy Brit Simon Cowell. See for yourself!

Don't you just hate being ordered around by some teeth sucking bacon hunting desk jockey? Mimi is ready to take a cart full of math supplies and shove it up that jerk's . . .well, you get the picture.

Get an admissions blog already Yale! demands Sam Jackson, or else Mimi is going to take that huge stack of admission papers and shove it up your . . . maybe I'm the one who should switch to decaff.

Get a Job! Peter demands of himself over at A School to Call Home. I was nice and left out "you bum!" since I've been doing my best to form an ass-shaped impression in my chair all summer.

Check Out the Homies

Everybody's always talking about Marsha! Marsha! Marsha! and her post defining Who am I?. I bet she never gets tired of that joke. I also bet she wishes she could just reach out through the internet and slap the living . . .once again, you get the picture.

Need a great idea for some Social Studies projects? How about 25 of them courtesy of Annette at Homeschooling Journey?

Why not learn a foreign language along with your child? asks Sylvia over at Po Moyemu--In My Opinion.

Teacher Certification and Testing is on Janine's mind at Why Homeschool.

Thanks to all who contributed. Next week's carnival will be hosted by Dr. Homeslice. Submissions should be sent to drhomeslice(at)hotmail(dot)com no later than 9 P.M. EST on Tuesday, July 31st, or you can use this handy submission form.

Carnival Entries Are Due

Once again I am hosting the Carnival of Education. Please submit all entries to me at mikea3_98@yahoo.com by 10 P.M. CST

The Dumbest Thing I've Ever Seen on TV

I thought television had hit a new low with the Discovery Channels Stunt Junkies, where the "part scientist, part daredevil" and the show's host seemed to lack the ability to form coherent thoughts or complete sentences without using the word Dude!, but yesterday, as my daughter was flipping through the channels, I saw something even more stupid.

She happened to stop on a show called Bridezillas on the WE TV network. One bridezilla actually forced her sister, who had the gall to get pregnant and be due around the date of her wedding when she was supposed to be baking 38 cakes (one for each table) and the wedding cake, to have her baby induced 2 weeks in advance.

Does the word "No!" ever occur to these idiots? And what about the future husbands, who stand their with stupid blank expressions on their faces? I long for the day when we'll be able to reach into the TV, grab these people, and slap them around some and tell them, "For God's sake get a pair of balls!"

In a few years some poor teacher will be raked over the coals for the test score's of these idiots' children, who obviously have no chance in life.

If you'll excuse me there's another pot of coffee with my name on it brewing.

How Much Brain Power Should This Take?

I'm currently in San Antonio, helping my sister-in-law and brother-in-law move to a new home. Amazingly enough, in this day and age, the house they were moving into did not have smoke detectors, so it was off to Wal-Mart for new ones. SIL decided to spend a little extra and get the "premium" detectors, from the company who claims their detectors will be the "First" to "Alert" you if you catch my drift.

Now for years we've had smoke detectors in our home that have a battery installation that is extremely simple. Snap the batter into the metal clips designed especially for 9 volt batteries, and make sure you use the clip in the back to hold it in place. A child could do it in 5 seconds. But in the business world, you know those people who think they know more about education than us teachers, if you're not changing you're not moving forward, and a battery clip that works but is an old design simply won't do. The new "First" to "Alert" you smoke detectors have a new swinging out battery compartment along the outer edge.

The only problem is, 9 volt batteries are rectangular, the smoke detector, and it's swing out battery compartment, have a rounded edge. We could not get the batteries installed without a major struggle.

I managed to get one in, after about 10 minutes of struggling and actually banging it on a countertop, at which point SIL decided she would just return them. Later we examined the brain power in the room trying to get these batteries installed.

Collectively we had: A BS in Education, an M_Ed in Education, a Doctor of Veterinary Medicine, and a Medical Doctor. Lest you think we were not prepared to deal with a mechanical device, there was also a BS in Biomedical Engineering.

I don't mean to brag, but I think its safe to say we had an above average amount of brain power in the room, and still couldn't figure out this supposedly new and better battery compartment.

So much for progress

At This Rate, I'm Going To Have To Change My Nickname to "Eyewitness"

For the 2nd time this week I have witnessed an accident on Highway 59 in East Texas. Earlier this week, on a stretch loaded with businesses, a car trying to turn to go south pulled out in front of a northbound pickup. The driver of the car tried to take off, but seeing as how his rear axle was snapped he didn't get too far.

This afternoon, just south of Moscow, Texas, I saw an 18 wheeler log truck take a turn and roll over. Even from half a mile away it was spectacular.

Luckily, no one was hurt in either accident. Why don't people just slow down a little when the roads are wet?

Summer Goal: Get A Hottub . . .Done

Thanks to EBay I have achieved ONE of my summer goals, to get a hottub. I got a great deal and thanks to my McGyver buddy, it is up and running. We built a concrete pad and added the extra wiring, and when I say "we" I mean mostly him. We also had fun driving around an enormous forklift we used to move the hottub around, well, except for that hour and a half we spent digging it out of the mud where it sank in my backyard because of all the rain we've been having.

In addition, the bathroom remodeling is done, just in time for my wife to come up with other summer projects.

All I need now is for Mr. Teacher to bring over some of his Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders friends and I'm all set.

Now For Something Funny

I wasn't familiar with Kevin Pollack until I came across this video on 100 Farmers and YouTube. I'll definitely have to look for more of his stuff.

Possible Future Head of TEA Violated Policy

An internal investigation at the Texas Education Agency has found the agency didn't follow policy, and that contracts were awarded to associates of top officials.

No big surprise here. Robert Scott, assistant TEA commissioner and possibly future head of TEA, has been described as a Perry loyalist (ass-kisser, sycophant). The article mentions two contracts he negotiated personally with a contractor.

In one case, a woman who received two $100,000 contracts for agency work told investigators that she negotiated the terms directly with TEA's deputy commissioner, Robert Scott, rather than the education service center administering the project.

The report also said that a consultant for the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation recommended hiring specific people, including his ex-wife, for grant contracts.

For years I considered myself a Republican, but in the last few I have changed that view. It's amazing how arrogant they are when they are in power, believing they are above the law, whether they are state or federal officials.

Different versions of this story can be found here and here, or the report itself can be found here.

Carnival of Education, The RoadTrip Edition

In honor of The Education Wonks, who are on the road to their summer home, allow me to present The Road Trip Edition of the Carnival of Education.



My Daily Reads


Did you learn ANYTHING this year? Well, the Science Goddess did and she's reflecting on them as she transitions to summer vacation.

Where else would you find a post titled Diplomas and Gorditas except at Learn Me Good? How long will it be before one of us is working at Wal-Mart High or Chik-Fil-A Elementary? If you like the blog then you'll definitely like The Book.





And speaking of McDonalds, would any of us enjoy being referred to as a McTeacher? Could those 10 hour school days at KIPP schools really be about teaching kids to blindly accept authority and long hours? Next week's host NYC Educator takes on the KIPPers.


Talk about your meltdowns, how about a principal using his office to buy crack cocaine? The Ed Wonks have labeled him the wanker of the day.


It seems like every week there is a new study released about education. Over at 3σ Left they examine a study they believe will be ignored.

Higher Education

How would you like to go to college for free? Campus Grotto has the lowdown on affordable colleges, and if you search the list carefully you'll find the one that's free for state residents.

But what if there are gaps in your college admission application? Mathew K. Tabor is the man you want to talk to then.

Campus Crime is a big topic these days, but what about crimes that are not so spectacularly horrible as the Virginia Tech shootings? Why Homeschool looks at a university that tried to cover up a murder in order to protect its image.

Inside The Blogs

Have you heard of Isaac Asimov's 3 Laws of Robotics? At Scenes From The Battlefield they've finished work on The Second Law of Behaviour Management. NOW I'm all curious as to what the first law was.



Are you already dreading thinking about next year? Frumteacher is and he has a list of resolutions for the 2007-2008 school year.

If you're a Science teacher in the state of Georgia you might want to check out the EIC Conference. It has a great deal of ideas for teaching in the great outdoors, as well as the story of a group of children who managed to get their state legislature to pass their bill.

Ever wondered how to tie Chemistry and Literature together? The ChemJerk has a list of summer reading in chemistry.

Another group of words I never thought I'd see together in the same sentence are physics or social justice. Is the PC mindset infiltrating even the hard science fields of education?

Teachers fear standardized tests as simplistic assessments of performance, which are then used as indicators of school success. Sound familiar? Not only is it happening in the U.S. but in Denmark also, where The Tempered Radical weighs in with observations about a trip to observe education in Denmark. I also wrote about a school in Denmark where students strip for the best seats at lunchtime.

California Teacher Dude Guy is currently searching for a teaching position, and his submission is entitled Thirteen Random Reasons Why Your School Should Hire CaliforniaTeacherGuy, making him 30% better than anyone with a Top Ten list.

I'd never heard of the term digital native until I received this entry from Life Without School. Even more interesting is the term Digital Immigrant, which is probably the category I fall in. I meet some of the qualifications, but I'd never figured out the R2D2 could shove bad guys off the walkways in Star Wars Lego.

I love finding a good deal, and The Digerati Life has come up with a list of Cheap Ways To Learn And Feed Your Brain.

Did You Know is an awesome look at facts regarding education and employment. Be sure to follow their link to Did You Know 2.0 and view the presentation.

I've heard it said that kindergarten is the new first grade, and the Scholar's Notebook agrees. Their submission to the carnival is called The manufactured crisis in kindergarten readiness and, you won't believe this, a company that sells materials to school districts is helping to spread the alarm.

I was hoping someone would tackle the ETS survey results about NCLB and Horse Sense and Nonsense has done it in this post. If case you're wondering here is how the "question" was presented to the respondents:

“The No Child Left Behind Act provides federal funds for school districts with poor children in order to close achievement gaps. It also requires states to set standards for education and to test students each year to determine whether the standards are being met by all students. In addition, No Child Left Behind provides funding to help teachers become highly qualified. It also provides additional funding and prescribes consequences to schools that fail to achieve academic targets set by their state. Based on this statement and anything else you may have heard, would you say that you have a favorable or an unfavorable opinion of the NCLB Act?”

I was lucky enough to grow up with a football field sized neutral ground in front of my house and a neighborhood full of kids to play with. When was the last time you saw a large group of kids playing outside in your neighborhood?, wonders Mrs. Bluebird. The only kids who play outside in my neighborhood have a basketball goal up in the driveway, and wait till after sundown when it's cooler.

Some people seem to know a lotta big fancy words. Silvia has some thoughts on a large vocabulary.

Privatization Issues

Privatization is a big issue among the "reform" crowd, but what about the privatization of non-instructional services? wonders Mr. Pullen.

Going to the Mat weighs in with the story of a group of parents who want to start an all girl charter school.

Next Week's Carnival

Next week's carnival will be hosted at NYC Educator. Please submit all entries to nyceducator[at]gmail[dot]com no later than 6 P.M. EST, or you can use this handy form.

Please Send Your Carnival Entries

To me, Mike in Texas, via mikea3_98@yahoo.cm by Tuesday, 10 P.M. CST.

What Do Teachers Make?

I know most teachers have probably already read these words, but I thought it was interesting to hear and see the person say them. His name is Taylor Mall. The video comes courtesy of Youtube and Teach42.

I'm The Redneck King of The Neighborhood

"We're" currently remodeling our bathroom, and when I say "we" I mean "me" of course. Oh it's not like my wife doesn't have important parts, from changing her mind about colors to criticizing my work, but painting and flooring are just not her thing.

Because I will be redoing the floor, the toilet has had to come out and currently resides on our back patio, making me the redneck king of the neighborhood.


Anytime I see a neighbor outside I'm tempted to go outside with a book and take a seat, maybe install a toilet paper holder.

Hit The Beach With The Science Goddess And The Carnival of Education

This week's edition of the Carnival of Education is a
Back To The Beach special with posts from some of my favorite bloggers, including Mr. Teachers, The Education Wonks and Ms. Corneilus, along with a host of other fine entries.

Next week's carnival will be hosted by yours truly. Please send submission to me, mikea3_98@yahoo.com

Sometimes I Just Don't Know What To Say About A Story

This is one of those times:

Students' stage strip for teachers

Teachers have refused to stop an annual striptease by pupils despite a video of an onstage lesbian love romp ending up on YouTube.

But officials at the school in Denmark are fighting to hold onto the annual event.

A spokesman said: 'The girls' teachers vote as the best get the best places on the tables in the canteen.'

Erik Olesen, head teacher at Silkeborg said everyone, including the school governors, had known about the contest and described it as 'harmless fun'.

But news of the striptease got out when some of the girls this year stripped naked and began to touch each other's breasts - then started rubbing baby oil over each other's bodies.

Two girls put on a lesbian show to cheering classmates and teachers

The whole incident was filmed by four other students on their mobile phones who then posted it on the internet. It has since been removed from YouTube.

The girls were only stopped from going further by teachers.

Headmaster Olesen said: 'I think they forgot what they were doing and where they were. But my concern now is not to punish anyone, but protect the girls who are now all over the internet.

'As for the students who recorded the contest, they didn't realize they had done anything illegal and I have had a long talk with them.'

But he added that he had no plans to scrap the striptease competition at the school. 'I am sure nothing like this will happen again,' he said.

'And anyway, the girls who did this didn't win the competition because their performance was over the top.'

Film of the girls stripping off in front of teachers and pupils sparked outrage among education chiefs who now want it banned.

I haven't checked any of the far-right anti-public school religious reform sites but isn't Denmark one of those countries they always mention as having better schools than us?

The whole story can be found here but be warned, some of the links from this site contain adult natured materials.

Somewhere There Are Baytown Teachers Being Held Accountable For This Kid's Test Scores

I've been closely following the story of the 4 kids killed in the Baytown crash and the story has become interesting, to say the least.

First of all, the driver survived and his actions are being dismissed by his mother. She has supposedly said her son, Bobby Davis, was just trying to get one of the girls home and that's why he was driving so fast. Incidentally, one of those killed was her son and Bobby's younger brother.

Apparently then, Mom knew little Bobby was driving without a license and driving a stolen vehicle at 3:30 in the morning. After seeing Mom's myspace page I think I can see why Bobby is the way he is, especially after reading this note he left for his MOTHER:

holy fucking shit i just tried one of those ringtone sites advertised on myspace and they really do work...i got some crystal clear ringtones for my phone instantly. i am talking about some cadillac shit here! you just gotta see for yourself, just copy and paste this site in your browser:

I would have rung my child's neck for leaving his mother a message like that, and his mother would have too.

Bobby wasn't exactly hanging around with a group of future brain surgeons if you examine some of the comments left on his myspace page:

bobby oh shit when i seen that shit on the news i could not believe what i was seein fool but dang hang in there yo im here for you if you need to talk playa but you shouldnt be sad cuz we all know hes in a better place so dont look foward or back look up stay cool

bobby omg this is so freakin crazy like i heard about the wreck and i was like damn like it was bad and that i felt bad for the people and their families in the wreck and then i found out that you were in it and that austin had died and so did loral and her cousin and your girlfriend and like i almost started cryin cuz like i actually knew people that were in the wreck and like i know that i don't know you that well but we did hang out a couple times and when we hung out we had a whole lot of fun like that day at dayton ole times day when it was me you melissa and elmo hangin out and we all rode rides and stuff and thank god you came so i had someone to ride with i'm so glad that i got to hang out with you that night and it sucks that this had to happen i'm so freakin sorry and i hope that you get threw this we don't need any more loses i hope so bad that you pull threw this and don't blame yourself for what happened i'm prayin for you and your family and everyone

Somewhere some teachers were probably raked over the coals, or in Bush's words, had their feet held to the fire, over this idiot's test scores.

What's Wrong With This Picture?

Out of Baytown, near Houston , comes this tragic story of 4 teenagers killed at an unlit railroad crossing. A terrible tragedy for sure, but as I read into the story I found something highly disturbing.

The victims died instantly early Thursday when the stolen SUV they were in slammed into a parked train.

It happened at a crossing at Archer Road and Fleming around 3:30 a.m

The 4 teenagers killed in this horrible accident were 14, 14, 13 and 12. Three of them were females.

What in the world were two 14 year old girls and one 12 year old girl doing out at 3:30 in the morning riding around in a stolen SUV??? Where were the parents of these children? One of them had snuck out, but what about the other 3?

The community, and in particular some of the parents of those killed, are blaming the railroad company for having an unlit railroad crossing, but the fact of the matter is, these kids were out when they shouldn't have been, doing things they shouldn't have been doing.

What a stupid, senseless tragedy. I for one would favor the death penalty for the driver, if he survives.

Do We Rely Too Much On Technology?

Yesterday some friends traveled to Schlitterbahn to meet us. Early in the morning I called my friend to coordinate our arrival times, as we had already purchased discount tickets for them. My friend informed me they were in Hearne, Texas, which is about 20 miles NORTH of the route we usually take. When I asked him why he went that way his answer was it was the route Yahoo maps indicated.

Now my friend is no dummy. He has a college degree and was a Wal-Mart manager for 15 years. Somehow the idea of consulting a map or an atlas never occurred to him, and he went a long way out of his way. The same thing happened to a brother of mine, when he visited after evacuating for Hurricane Katrina.

Upon arriving home, and after following my instructions on a better route back, my friend informed me my way had cut 60 miles off the trip.

Who says computers always know better?

Blogging With An Empty Wallet

I'm currently blogging from Austin,Tx, where the Sheration Hotel apparently has designs on taking every last bit of money we have.

My wife is here for a conference, and my daughter and I have tagged along. So far I've been shocked to discover:

1. I have to pay an extra $10 a day for internet access.

2. We have to pay 12 bucks a day plus taxes to park in the hotel's parking garage.

3. The bottled water in my room costs $5 a dollar.

I know some of you will be quick to point out I'm just a rube from East Texas, but a couple of weeks ago when we were here for my son's graduation we had free parking, free breakfast and free internet, just at a different hotel.

My wife chose the Sheraton because it is where her conference is being held. I would have gladly dropped her off and stayed somewhere else.

Shocking Tanks

I have GOT to get me these!

Texas Charters Are The Biggest TAKS Cheats

From the "things you won't see posted on reform websites" comes this story and this story. Texas schools have taken a beating in the press, with many newspapers calling for investigations of TAKS cheating. However, an in-depth study found that most of the cheating goes on at Texas charter schools.

Advocates of charters often claim market forces will drive the bad ones out, but in one of the stories I found these tidbits:

TEA has spent much of the last decade pursuing sanctions or other actions against Gulf Shores and its parent organization, Gulf Shores Academy. The charter system has a history of financial and academic problems, including a roughly $8 million debt to the state for over-reporting student attendance. State officials have, for several years, been trying to shut down the school.

Alphonso Crutch's has also long been among the state's most troubled charter schools, with state officials having tried – and failed – to shut it down several years ago.

So much for state oversite and market forces. I look forward to sharing these newspapers stories at several of the "reform" websites.

Why Is It?

I often watch the"Commodities and Markets" section of CNN and monitor the price of gasoline futures. Given that I may a 50 mile round trip to work everyday it directly effects my wallet.

What I'm wondering is, how come if the price of futures goes up 10 cents a gallon the price of gas at the pump immediately goes up, but if the price goes down it takes days for there to be a decrease?

Just curious.

Spamalot!

Last night we traveled to the Theater Under the Stars and saw the Broadway production of Spamalot!. For those of you who are not familiar with the movie Monty Python and the Holy Grail I would highly suggest watching the movie first. If you are a fan, you will find the play absolutely hilarious!

On The First Day of My Summer Vacation, I Woke Up . . .

Today is my first official day of summer vacation. I have absolutely nothing planned to do today, except maybe try out my new racquetball racket ($23.99 at Academy, thank you very much).

My wife seems to have other plans. She would like me to:

1. Paint the bedroom (what's wrong with 13 year old paint??)

2. Build a garden around the east and north side of our house.

3. Put new flooring in a bathroom, strip the old wallpaper off, and paint.

In other news, my son has landed a job with the Arkansas Democrat Gazette. Sometime this week I will have to rent a U-Haul trailer and bring him his stuff. That should be a busy day, with it being a 5 hour drive one way, and if I know my son his apartment will be messy within 5 minutes of him moving in.

In addition, I've been bidding on hot tubs on EBay. I'm thinking a nice covered deck around it and a sign that says "NO KIDS ALLOWED"

He Are A Graduate

My blogging has been light lately. Last week I spent 3 days in Austin, Tx attending my son's graduation and helping him move some of his stuff back.

I've written before about the disgusting state of his apartment and I wish I could say he was shamed into being less of a slob, but as you can see from the picture he hasn't.

Maybe he'll grow out of it.

Just A Scary Thought to Start Your Week

Ten years ago, the parents of the kids we teach today, were going crazy for the Macarena.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

If You're Not Disgusted You're Not Paying Attention

From the files of "I only thought I'd seen everything" comes this almost unbelievable story via CNN about a mother who was offering her 7 year old daughter up for sex, actually advertising it on the Internet. Fortunately for the child the buyer was an undercover police officer, although the police suspect she may have been victimized before. Not only was the mother selling her own child, she had planned on taking pictures of the molesting and sell then on the Internet. Unbelievable!

Somewhere in Michigan is a 3rd grade teacher who will be held accountable for this child when she doesn't pass her high stakes test mandated by the federal government. Several years ago we had a 4th grader who witnessed the murder/suicide of his parents, but by golly he still had to take the state tests.

I'm disgusted on many levels.

Raid Covered Cookies

Let's see if I can stump Michael with this one.

When I buy cookies I eat just four and throw the rest away. But first I spray them with Raid so I won't be tempted to dig them out of the garbage and eat them. Be careful, though, because Raid really doesn't taste that bad.

And I'm outtttttttaaaaa here!

My Lunch

Like most of my fellow "Special Populations" teachers, I now eat my lunch in my room. It's a decision I had been contemplating for awhile, as I've previously mentioned here I was getting tired of listening to the various teacher cliques discuss their party/dinner/get-together plans. The final straw for me was when a teacher, whom I considered a friend, screamed at me during lunch over a comment I had made regarding her MySpace page. Now, I'll be the first to admit I have the habit of sticking my foot in my mouth, but in this case I'm certain she misunderstood what I was trying to say. One of her good friends asked me about it and I explained what I meant, and she informed me that, yes, the other teacher had misunderstood what I was saying.

Since this incident, about 4 weeks ago, I have taken to eating lunch in my room. I have rediscovered the joy of reading at lunchtime and yesterday I just finished reading Stephen King's Bag of Bones. I HIGHLY recommend it. All I can say is, if I had a house with a basement or cellar I would now be afraid to go down in it.

I Owe, I Owe . . .And Monday's Quote

Well its back to work for me. Kudos to Michael, who has been getting every quote right. Is he reading the same book as me?

The thing that impresses me most about American is the way parents obey their children.

Its off to work I go.

Now Back to Work

I've had a good Spring Break. I worked on a swing for my back porch, visited relatives in Louisiana, ate far too much, and in a fit of insanity, my buddy and I laid down 3200 pounds of cement to expand the cement base under my porch out back.

My wife, who until recently was totally uninterested, is now planning where the various relaxation devices will go. So far we will be putting a swing, 2 hammock chairs (get them on Ebay, trust me), 2 rocking chairs and an occasional 2 person hammock. Yesterday I borrowed my neighbors fire pit to burn the 40 empty cement bags and it turned into a good time. We all sat around the fire, and occasionally someone would run and find something else to throw into it to burn and to refill our drinks. My wife and I were born city dwellers, so we never experienced the joy of an open fire on a cool spring night. My friend's mother in law has promised to find us one cheap at a garage sale.

A good end to a good Spring Break.

The Book List

So many of the bloggers have done this I decided it was time I gave it a try. The books in bold print are the ones I've read.

1. The Da Vinci Code (Dan Brown) –started to read it but HATED it and never finished.
2. Pride and Prejudice (Jane Austen)
3. To Kill A Mockingbird (Harper Lee)
4. Gone With The Wind (Margaret Mitchell)
5. The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King (Tolkien)
6. The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring (Tolkien)
7. The Lord of the Rings: Two Towers (Tolkien)
8. Anne of Green Gables (L.M. Montgomery)
9. Outlander (Diana Gabaldon)
10. A Fine Balance (Rohinton Mistry)
11. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (Rowling)
12. Angels and Demons (Dan Brown)
13. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (Rowling)
14. A Prayer for Owen Meany (John Irving)
15. Memoirs of a Geisha (Arthur Golden)
16. Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (Rowling)
17. Fall on Your Knees(Ann-Marie MacDonald)
18. The Stand (Stephen King)
19. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban(Rowling)
20. Jane Eyre (Charlotte Bronte)
21. The Hobbit (Tolkien)
22. The Catcher in the Rye (J.D. Salinger)
23. Little Women (Louisa May Alcott)
24. The Lovely Bones (Alice Sebold)
25. Life of Pi (Yann Martel)
26. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (Douglas Adams) – don’t forget your towel.
27. Wuthering Heights (Emily Bronte)
28. The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe (C. S. Lewis)
29. East of Eden (John Steinbeck)
30. Tuesdays with Morrie(Mitch Albom)
31. Dune (Frank Herbert)
32. The Notebook (Nicholas Sparks)
33. Atlas Shrugged (Ayn Rand
34. 1984 (Orwell)
35. The Mists of Avalon (Marion Zimmer Bradley)
36. The Pillars of the Earth (Ken Follett)
37. The Power of One (Bryce Courtenay)
38. I Know This Much is True (Wally Lamb)
39. The Red Tent (Anita Diamant)
40. The Alchemist (Paulo Coelho)
41. The Clan of the Cave Bear (Jean M. Auel)
42. The Kite Runner (Khaled Hosseini)
43. Confessions of a Shopaholic (Sophie Kinsella)
44. The Five People You Meet In Heaven (Mitch Albom)
45. Bible
46. Anna Karenina (Tolstoy)
47. The Count of Monte Cristo (Alexandre Dumas)
48. Angela’s Ashes (Frank McCourt)
49. The Grapes of Wrath (John Steinbeck)
50. She’s Come Undone (Wally Lamb)
51. The Poisonwood Bible (Barbara Kingsolver)
52. A Tale of Two Cities (Dickens)
53. Ender’s Game (Orson Scott Card)
54. Great Expectations (Dickens)
55. The Great Gatsby (Fitzgerald)
56. The Stone Angel (Margaret Laurence)
57. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (Rowling)
58. The Thorn Birds (Colleen McCullough)
59. The Handmaid’s Tale (Margaret Atwood)
60. The Time Traveller’s Wife (Audrey Niffenegger)
61. Crime and Punishment (Fyodor Dostoyevsky)
62. The Fountainhead (Ayn Rand)
63. War and Peace (Tolstoy)
64. Interview With The Vampire (Anne Rice)
65. Fifth Business (Robertson Davis)
66. One Hundred Years Of Solitude (Gabriel Garcia Marquez)
67. The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants (Ann Brashares)
68. Catch-22 (Joseph Heller) “How can he see he’s got sties in his eyes when he has sties in his eyes?”
69. Les Miserables (Hugo)
70. The Little Prince (Antoine de Saint-Exupery)
71. Bridget Jones’ Diary (Fielding)
72. Love in the Time of Cholera (Marquez)
73. Shogun (James Clavell)
74. The English Patient (Michael Ondaatje)
75. The Secret Garden (Frances Hodgson Burnett)
76. The Summer Tree (Guy Gavriel Kay)
77. A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Betty Smith)
78. The World According To Garp (John Irving) – who wouldn’t want a disaster proof house?
79. The Diviners (Margaret Laurence)
80. Charlotte’s Web (E.B. White)
81. Not Wanted On The Voyage (Timothy Findley)
82. Of Mice And Men (Steinbeck)
83. Rebecca (Daphne DuMaurier)
84. Wizard’s First Rule (Terry Goodkind)
85. Emma (Jane Austen)
86. Watership Down(Richard Adams)
87. Brave New World (Aldous Huxley)
88. The Stone Diaries (Carol Shields)
89. Blindness (Jose Saramago)
90. Kane and Abel (Jeffrey Archer)
91. In The Skin Of A Lion (Ondaatje)
92. Lord of the Flies (Golding)
93. The Good Earth(Pearl S. Buck)
94. The Secret Life of Bees (Sue Monk Kidd)
95. The Bourne Identity (Robert Ludlum)
96. The Outsiders (S.E. Hinton)
97. White Oleander (Janet Fitch)
98. A Woman of Substance (Barbara Taylor Bradford)
99. The Celestine Prophecy (James Redfield)
100. Ulysses (James Joyce
101. Jurassic Park
102. Learn Me Good

Help! Help! I'm Being Repressed!

I was shocked to discover this evening that my blog, Education in Texas, is banned in China! Once again the voice of freedom and truth is being repressed. If you would like to see if your voice is also being stifled you can click here. A tip of the hat to NYC Educator for the link to the test.

Your Monday Morning Mad Quote

Kudos to Michael, who correctly identified George Carlin as the speaker for last week's quote. And now for this week's:

The Senate is investigating profiteering on oil and gas. The important questions are: 1)Which oil companies are raking in huge profits? and 2)HOw big of contributors are they?

Speaking of oil company profits, gas prices have skyrocketed once again just in time for Spring Break. Last year the oil companies missed out on some major profits by waiting a couple of weeks too long to jack up the prices, so this year they've done it a little earlier. Last year's concerns driving the price up? North Korea, Iran and increased demand for gasoline. This year's? North Korea, Iran and increased demand for gasoline.

How's This For Caring?

I found an interesting website by a following a link posted at The 108th Edition of the Carnival of Education, hosted by Dr. Homslice.

As many of you no doubt know, New Orleans Public Schools were decimated by Hurricane Katrina and the federal govt. has swooped in to push charter schools upon the city's children. By following the links provided I was able to find the website for an organization called Teach NOLA. The website offers two links for potential teachers, one for certified and one for uncertified. Certified teachers are directed to a page that contains this greeting:

teachNOLA seeks the nation's most outstanding certified teachers to make a difference by teaching in New Orleans charter schools.

Uncertified teachers' link leads them to a page that says this:

teachNOLA seeks the nation's most outstanding young, mid- and post-career professionals to make a difference by teaching in New Orleans' Recovery School District.

In short, the charter schools are being given the best of the best, while the public schools, referred to as Recovery School District, have to fight over what's left.

Sounds like the perfect plan for the reform crowd to "prove" charter schools are better.

Don't the children of New Orleans deserve better?

A new Monday Quote

Congrats to Michael, who correctly answered that H. L. Mencken made last Monday's quote.

Now for this week's quote. Who was it that said:

In the United States anybody can become president. That's the problem.

Well time for me to start my Monday denial chant. It is NOT Monday, It is NOT Monday, It is NOT Monday . . .

And the Answer is, Plus a New Quote

Anonymous guessed correctly that Thomas Jefferson made last week's quote. Interesting that Charles Beard though quoting the founding fathers would make you be considered a radical. I wish I had the date for that quote from Beard, it would really be interesting to see if it was made in the last few years.

And now for this week's quote:

For every problem there is a solution that is clear, simple and wrong"

I've gone a little more obscure on this one to make it more interesting.

Ugh, another Tuesday

I hope this Tuesday is better than the last one. After my last post Mr. Teacher complained that no beautiful co-workers notice when he's out. I still contend that it is worse when a beautiful co-worker thinks you were gone when you were there all day.

Here's a laugh to (hopefully) start your Tuesday wright:

Monday's Mad Quote

Feeling a little rebellious? Then this quote is just for you:

The strongest reason for the people to retain the right to keep and bear arms is, as a last resort, to protect themselves against tyranny in the government

And here's another quote to help you figure out who the dangerous rebel was that made the previous quote:

One of the best ways to get yourself a reputation as a dangerous citizen these days is to go about repeating the very phrases which our fathers used in the great struggle for independence . . .Charles A. Beard

We're #1!

Here in Texas, the birthplace of NCLB type "reforms" we've obtained considerable status in regards to other states. For example Texas is:

- 1st in the percentage of uninsured children
- 1st in food insecurity
- 1st in child abuse deaths
- 1st in the number of incarcerated adults
- 2nd in the percentage of the population that goes hungry
- 2nd in teen pregnancy
- 5th in the overall poverty rate
- 6th in crime
- 47th in income and food stamps benefits for the neediest
- 50th in the percentage of fully-immunized two-year-olds

In his never ending quest to make his friends rich and look like he cares about Texas children remedy these deplorable numbers, Gov. Goodhair Perry has proposed cutting state services even further to pay for property tax reductions. Texas schools will receive zero new dollars over the next two years, meaning that once again Texas will be the only state in the union to cut per student funding.

Yahoo!

The complete report can be read at Tom Paine.

I Should've Called in Dead

I should've just stayed home Tuesday, it was one of those days, but instead I chose to ignore two very important warning signs.

1. My iron caught fire when I was doing my clothes.

2. When I did get to work a beautiful co-worker asked me why I'd been out the day before . . .I'd been there the whole day.

Is there any wonder why I hate Tuesdays?

Monday's Mad Quote

Here is the first of what I'm going to call Monday's Mad Quotes:

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them all and took their land

Any guesses?

Now remember, it is NOT Monday, it is NOT Monday, it is NOT Monday . . .

And The Answer Is. . .Oh, And Don't Forget the Carnival is Now Open

Kudos to Scott S. Floyd, who correctly identified Voltaire as the person who said, "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

I really enjoy finding and posting quotes and I'm thinking of making it a regular post, like Ms. Cornelius does over at A Shrewdness of Apes every Monday.

In other news, the 104th Edition of the Carnival of Education is now up and running over at The Median Sib.

And The Answer Is, Plus a New Quote

Kudos to Michael, who correctly identified Herman Goerring as the person who made the quote. Yes, that Herman Goerring, the Hitler crony and Luftwaffe chief during World War II.

Now for a new one. Who said:

Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities.

Amazing how these quotes from the past fit the present so precisely.

An Interesting Quote

I came across this quote in an Uncle John's Reader, published by Bathroom Reader's Institute and thought it was very interesting.

In a democracy the people have some say in the matter through their elected representatives, and in the United States only Congress can declare wars."

"Oh, that is all well and good, but, voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger.

Anyone care to guess who said this?

Geaux Saints!

And Now a List of No-No Words

Lake Superior State University has released its annual list of List of Words and Phrases Banished from the Queen’s English for Mis-Use, Over-Use and General Uselessness.

Some of my favorites include:

- Combined celebrity names (TomKate, Brangelina)

- i-ANYTHING

— We’re pregnant (see my previous posts about baby showers for a good idea of how I feel about this)

— Armed robbery gone bad or drug deal gone bad (are there that many armed robberies gone good?)

— Ask your doctor

— Boasts (used as a verb, i.e. the home boasts a spacious fireplace)

If you have a word or phrase that you find really annoying, you can submit it for consideration in next year's list here.

I would like to see large defense companies banned from advertising on TV. Not that I have anything against Lockheed-Martin, but why would they spend money to tell me about the great new fighter they're building for the military? Do they think I'm going to decide what I really need in my driveway is a $40 fighter and rush out and buy one??

Nothing Says Immaturity Like . . .

your very own potato cannon.








Happy New Year Everyone!

The Festivus Airing of Grievances

A tip of the hat to Ms. Cornelius over at A Shrewdness of Apes for the link to the Festivus Airing of Grievances page.

Here's my personal Festivus grievance:

People who drive in the left hand lane below the speed limit, even though they have clearly never passed anyone in their lives and never will. Do you think those "Slower Traffic Keeps Right" signs are there just to give you something to read?

I'm pushing for a constitutional amendment to allow you to bump them out of your way.

Feel free to add your own.

In Which I Discover I Need A Walker

No, not that kind of walker, at least not yet. The kind of walker I'm referring to is like the one in the picture to the left. Moody Gardens had these "walkers" to help people who were having difficulty ice skating. Unfortunately, I couldn't get any of the kids using them to let me have one. I did manage to skate a few times around the rink without falling down and breaking anything, so I consider myself as having come out ahead.

Merry Christmas to All!

Moody Gardens Here We Come

Last month I won 4 tickets for all the attractions at Moody Gardens in Galveston from a local radio station. The contest was one where you had to identify the title and the artist, and they usually make it very easy by playing a clip that has the title in it. The title, Electric Avenue, was very easy but no one seemed to know it was by Eddie Grant.

I haven't been to Moody Gardens in years, but their website boasts of a Festival of Lights, an Aquarium Pyramid and an ice skating rink (just the thing for a 43 year old with a sedentary lifestyle and bad knees).

Hopefully I won't bang my head on the ice.

Spinning Class . . .Am I Missing Something?

The local healthl club has converted one of its racquetball courts into a facility for "spinning" class. This particular club is the only one in town that has racquetball courts and the courts are often quite busy, so I'm at a loss as to why they would give up 25% of their courts.

I watched a class the other day, with all of two people in it, and determined you need the following items:

1. stationary bikes
2. a really loud sound system
3. some really crappy music
4. a "Bike Nazi" to yell at the class members.

If you've ever seen the movie Fever Pitch and you remember the scene were Drew Barrymore is in exercise class on stationary bikes while she talks about the new guy she met, then you have seen a spinning class in action.

Am I missing something here?

I Think I'm Gonna Hurl . . . Spew, Ralph, Upchuck, Praise The Porcelain God

Well the fall semester is over and what a whirlwind week it was, filled with field trips, parties, fun activities and mostly sweet things to eat. I would estimate in the last week I've consumed my body weight in sugar laden foods, leaving me to feel like it will all be coming up soon.

Please feel free to add your own euphemism for vomiting.

Just a chuckle for those in need of one

The Queen Blogger of All Public Education Bashers is Promoting Reduced Class Sizes

I couldn't believe it, but Joanne Jacobs is actually using the Tennesee STAR Study results as a proof early education and class sizes are good for student achievement.

I couldn't believe it when I read:

Small classes in the early grades provided a lasting benefit to students, especially low-income black students, in the Tennessee STAR study.

Maybe us teachers, who have been saying reduce class sizes for years, really do know what we're talking about.

Things Are Getting Bad Out There

The Burger King Corporation has come up with a new promotion for its unusual "King" commercial character, video games where the King plays the main character and apparently injures himself frequently in his quest to serve Whoppers to other characters. The games are available for $3.99 with the purchase of a meal

In short, Burger King has come up with a new way to market its high fat, high calorie food to children and is getting parents to directly cover the costs. The kicker is hundreds of thousands of parents will oblige them by buying the games. Schools will continue to be blamed for the obesity epidemic among America's children.

I would ask, are parents really that stupid, but I'm afraid I already know the answer.

Oreo Balls, They Taste Great and They Sound a Little Naughty

I had to attend another baby shower today, the 3rd so far this year (with 4 more to go), but this time I really didn't mind because one of our special ed. teachers had made her infamous Oreo Balls. They are so good that I'd be willing to bet the folks who wrote the Lays Potato Chip commercial (Bet you can't eat just one) had traveled forward in time and sampled them. She was also kind enough to share her recipe, which follows:

3 bags of Oreos (2 reg. & 1 double stuffed)
4 boxes of cream cheese
Chocolate almond bark (for dipping)
Vanilla almond bark (for drizzling)

Crush the Oreos in a Ziploc bag and pour into a large bowl. Mix the cream cheese in with the crushed Oreos. The mixture will still have a crumbly texture. Put the mixture in the refrigerator and let it set overnight. Take the mixture out and form into balls. Dip the balls into the melted chocolate almond bark and place on wax paper. After the chocolate hardens, drizzle the melted vanilla almond bark over the Oreo balls. Store the Oreo balls in the refrigerator.

Go ahead, try it. You WON'T be able to eat just one.

Another Katrina T-shirt

This one is for NYC Educator, who liked the levee shirt but didn't think it was funny.

If this one doesn't make you laugh big guy I'll have to get out the dirty ones.

A Funny Shirt Being Sold in New Orleans

I spent 4 days in the New Orleans area last week. This is one of the funnier (and clean) t-shirts being sold, just in case you need a laugh.

Bush Family Ethics at Work

From Jim Hightower comes this story of how clueless Neil Bush is benefitting from legislation championed by his brother W. According to the story:

As honcho of an outfit called Ignite! Learning, he goes around to school districts hustling a computerized learning center dubbed COW, for Curriculum On Wheels. Made up to look like a purple cow, it's wheeled into classrooms where it uses jingles and cartoon videos to "teach" students. Each COW costs $3,800 and at least 13 school districts have used No Child Left Behind money to purchase them. That money is primarily intended to help disadvantaged kids learn reading and math – yet, Neil's COWs don't teach either of these subjects. Curious.

My favorite part of the story:

Ignite's ethics are also on display in a company video on its website. A Texas teacher named Lori gives a glowing testimonial about how COW did wonders for a young student named India. Only, Lori is really not India's teacher. She's Ignite's marketing director. Ignite says Lori was not lying... just role playing.

Hightower doesn't mention a few other ethically challenged players in the education "reform" movement including Junk Bond King and convicted felon Micahel Milken, the moneybags for K12 Inc. Or William "The Book of Virtues" Bennett, whose book shares stories of how we all should all be living our lives while he is racking up huge gambling losses.

On a side note:

Happy Thanksgiving to All!

Ahhh, vacation

Yesterday was a great day, nice weather, last Friday before a week off, a payday AND cinnamon rolls in the cafeteria for breakfast. It doesn't get any better than that.

Well, there was that fact that I forgot to finish my lesson plans. And I think I left some rechargeable batteries plugged in to the recharger. But other than that it was a pretty good day.

Now I'm off to spend the obligatory 3 days visiting relatives in Louisiana.

Happy Thanksgiving to all!

A Dirty Little Cartoon

This comic is so delightfully dirty I had to post it. Of course, if you were never once an immature 14 year old male, or don't currently have the maturity of a 14 year old male, you may not get it or find it that dirty.

Enjoy!

The Texas Parent PAC scores big in the election

Via TexasISD.com comes this press release from the Texas Parent Pac, a public education advocacy group who has been extremely successful in electing pro education candidates to the Texas Congress.

According to the group:

Children, parents, and neighborhood public schools were big winners in the Texas House of Representatives elections Tuesday, as many new legislators were elected who are committed to strengthening public education. This was partly due to the efforts of Texas Parent PAC, a statewide political committee formed in July 2005 with the goal of electing more state legislators who would stand up for children and high quality public education.

All of the candidates supported by the Texas Parent PAC were successful, many defeating pro voucher candidates whoring for San Antonio millionaire Dr. James Leinenger.

One mistake in their press release, Donna Howard is a Republican, not a Democrat. She defeated Republican lapdog and public school basher Kent Grusendorf in the Republican primaries earlier in the year.

Good News and Bad News

Today has been a mixed blessing, both good news and bad news.

Good News After a week of fruitless searching I have found my rechargeable flashlight. It was in the attic exactly where I left it.

Bad News I found 3 electrical wires that run to an area of the garage where there are no electrical outlets or devices. It is driving me crazy wondering what they go to.

As soon as my flashlight is recharged I'm finding out.

Go Bush Go!!!

Not THAT Bush, or the title would have said, "Go Bush Go! And Stay There!"

I'm talking about Reggie Bush and the fact the NFL is returning to my hometown of New Orleans for some Monday Night Football.

There will be massive amounts of media coverage, probably including many parts of the city still devastated and yet to be rebuilt, if they ever are. My old neighborhood is showing signs of life, the bar on the corner has reopened although Benny's (a.k.a. The Butcher) Barbershop on the opposite corner hasn't. I once had to take shelter in that bar, as Benny was attempting to settle a domestic dispute with his wife by waving a pistol around and firing it into the air. At the time, it was a hangout for a much older crowd. If you've ever seen the scene from Animal House where they go into the bar to see Otis Day and the Knights, and all music and talking stops and everyone stares at them then you know what it was like when I stepped into the senior citizen's bar. However, they were kind enough to assure me that Benny often fired his pistol into the air during arguements with his wife and invited me to have a beer. But I digress. The home I grew up in has been remodeled from a double to single home and is for sale. I believe the asking price is $170,000 which rules out me buying it for sentimental reasons.

My last time in the Superdome was about two years ago. My nephew-in-law and myself bought two sideline tickets off a street scalper entrepeneur and watched a truly awful Saints game. The Bronos marched up and down on the Saints at will. How bad was it? The fans cheered when a Broncos back was held to only 6 yards on a carry! It was so bad the Saints cuckoo owner, Tom Benson, said afterwards they played like a bunch of high schoolers. It was so bad a diehard Saints fan intentionally started a fight with a Broncos fan so he could get thrown out and not have to watch the rest of the game. He did miss a really good booing and cursing session when time expired.

So hopefully New Orleans will be ready for some football. Hopefully the Saints revamped defense will put some major pressure on Michael Vick. I'll be in front of the TV in my Deuce McAllistar jersey.

Run Reggie run!

Another Late Friday Afternoon Report That Makes the Bushies Look Bad

In another late Friday afternoon release, a recent audit of Bush's reading panel has turned up significant evidence of ignored laws and violations of ethical standards.

According to this CNN story,

. . .the Reading First program has been beset by conflicts of interest and willful mismanagement. It suggests the department broke the law by trying to dictate which curriculum schools must use.

Other juicy tidbits include:

It also depicts a program in which review panels were stacked with people who shared the director's views, and in which only favored publishers of reading curricula could get money.

One Bush official, Chris Doherty, program director for Reading First, was found to have said of he didn't approve of:

They are trying to crash our party and we need to beat the (expletive deleted) out of them in front of all the other would-be party crashers who are standing on the front lawn waiting to see how we welcome these dirtbags

A typical, unqualified slimeball Bush appointee who doens't give a damn about children and who has never taught a day in his life. The "party" he is referring to is paid for by the taxpayers at the expense of children's educations.

Other findings from found the Ed. Dept.:

- Botched the way it picked a panel to review grant applications, raising questions over whether grants were approved as the law requires (Botched? No. Deliberately loaded up the panel giving out the grants? Yes.)

- Screened grant reviewers for conflicts of interest, but then failed to identify six who had a clear conflict based on their industry connections. (I wonder if those 6 had connections to McGraw-Hill?)

- Did not let states see the comments of experts who reviewed their applications (Why should they? They've been ignoring the comments of professional educators for years)

- Required states to meet conditions that weren't part of the law (why let a little thing like the LAW get in your way when your friends need to make some money?)

- It says he (Doherty) repeatedly used his influence to steer money toward states that used a reading approach he favored, called Direct Instruction, or DI (Wonder what kind of deals were made to make sure DI received that money?)

Spellings, of course, knows nothing about it all. I predict very shortly there will be editorials from Jay Mathews claiming the investigation is riddled with inaccuracies. Look for it by the end of the week.

One for the techies

I found this in Lateshow archives, from this summer. It gave me a laugh, so for all you computer geeks out there:

Top Ten Signs You Bought A Bad Computer


10. Runs on 200 "D" batteries

9. In the morning you have to defrost it

8. Runs on Windows '78

7. Box reads "Pre-loaded with hundreds of viruses!"

6. Tech support number is a Silicon Valley Applebee's

5. For better internet reception, salesman includes pair of rabbit ears

4. You move the pointer around by licking the screen

3. It's made by IBN

2. The mouse bit you

1. When you tell it to print, it tells you to go screw yourself

My wife often complains that we don't have a "real computer" and that I should stop buying cheap stuff. She doesn't buy my arguement that all the parts are basically the same AND I built it myself. Somehow everytime she touches it it messes up.

Must be an I-D-10-T problem.

Rediscovering an old joy

While cleaning out my storage unit I came across my old collection of Calvin and Hobbes books and I rediscovered the joy of reading them. My daughter has also become a big fan.

If you liked Calvin and Hobbes then you will probably also enjoy Zits. I'm convinced that Bill Waterson, the creator of Calvin and Hobbes, must be one of the people producing Zits, or they were extremely heavily influenced by him.

Homer Simpson's Life Lessons

Found this list of Homer Simpson's life lessons and thought I'd pass my favorites along.

"Kids are like monkeys, only louder."

"When someone tells you your butt is on fire, you should take them at their word. "

"You can have many different jobs and still be lazy."

"You may think it's easier to de-ice your windshield with a flamethrower, but there are repercussions. Serious repercussions."

"There are some things that just aren't meant to be eaten. "

"The intelligent man wins his battles with pointed words. I'm sorry -- I meant sticks. Pointed sticks. "

"There are way too many numbers. The world would be a better place if we lost half of them -- starting with 8. I've always hated 8. "

"When you borrow something from your neighbor, always do it under the cover of darkness."

"My favorite color is chocolate."

I can't believe they left out, "Donuts, is there anything they can't do"

If you're really bored you can read life lessons from Pamela Anderson, Ozzy Osbourne, Tom Petty andHeather Locklear.

Talk Nerdy to Me, Baby

I've been giddy with excitement all week. Its been months since I've stuck my hand inside my computer to upgrade some piece of equipment but that long drought has officially come to an end. Last weekend I ordered this video card from Tiger Direct. At the time I ordered it there was a $15 mail in rebate, so my total price was only $35.

What did I get for my money? I upgraded from a 4X AGP 64MB card to an 8X 256MB card. I had been having some difficulties with my computer freezing up, and when I pulled the old card out it practically fell apart in my hand. My next purchase will be for more memory. While checking out the specs on my motherboard I happened to notice it could handle up to a gig of DDR 400MHZ. I'm currently running 512MB of 266 mhz DDR RAM.

If I only had a serious game to play to test out the new capabilities. The most intensive game I have is Combat Flight Sim 3, which is a buggy piece of garbage.

Hmmm, I wonder if TigerDirect sells software?

Dude!

The other night I watched a show on the Discovery Channel called the Stunt Junkies. An episode the other night featured someone trying to skate down a huge ramp, then jump onto a 30 ft. rail and "grind" himself over the edge of a cliff and into the Grand Canyon, where he would parachute to safety. Now I'm a big fan of The Darwin Awards and I'm all for stupid people removing themselves from the gene pool, but what irks me about this show is these people are promoted as "part scientist, part stuntman".

On the show I watched the big concern was that as the skateboarder transitioned from the ramp to the rail he might fall and not clear the rocky cliff on his way down, which is exactly what happened. Fortunately for him, he landed on his back on the rail and slid far enough down it to clear the rocks safely. Upon landing at the bottom of the cliff he had this conversation with the show's host:

Host: Dude!
Stunt Junkie: Dude!
Host: Dude!!
Stunt Junkie: Dude!!
Host: DUDE!
Stunt Junkie: DUDE!

Most of you are probably not aware that the word dude can be used to convey many different emotions, so for those of you who are not immature males here is a translation of the conversation above:

Host: Dude!! (That was quite spectacular, unfortunately I lack the vocabulary to express my feelings of excitement, even though I'm the host of a TV show)
Stunt Junkie: Dude! (That is quite alright my friend, as I am not capable of comprehending most polysyllabic words)
Host: Dude! (You must be relieved that your incredible good luck more than compensated for your lack of adequate planning, safety measures and overall good sense)
Stunt Junkie: Dude! (Yes, I am happy I did not bash my skull against the rocks)
Host: DUDE! (Will you be performing any future stunts that will result in a serious decline in your life expectancy?)
Stunt Junkie: DUDE! (Undoubtedly I'll be experiencing many future blows to my head that will result in a plethora of bad ideas on my part)

The hero of this episode took a helicopter ride back to the top of the cliff where he was greeted by the stunt coordinator who said, and I quote, "Dude"

Ever wonder why so many kids have such poor vocabularies?

Glurch, fun to make and fun to say

As classes make their first visits of the school year to my lab I try to give the kids something really exciting to work on to get them interested in Science. Last year I used Oobleck, which I couldn't use again due to the fact my 3rd graders had already seen it, so this year I went with something similar called glurch.

I had originally used this recipe, which called for either a mix of 50% water and 50% white glue OR water and boric acid, but I have found a combination of both works really well.

I let the kids mix the water and glue mix together, give them a discussion about the properties of matter and then have them mix the boric acid, which can be found in the laundry detergent aisle under the name "20 Mule Team Borax". You should have kids wear safety gear while creating the mix, as borax is an eye irritant. The mixture, when just right, will bounce like a superball and take permanent marker off of objects.

My 14th First Day

My 14th first day has come and gone and I have to admit it was a pleasant one.

Our school was absolutely immaculate, with floors polished till you could have eaten off of them. I didn't see even one student crying, which was a first for me. On the first day of school us teachers who don't have regular classrooms, called "the special pops" teachers, do foyer duty helping kids and parents find rooms and room assignments. We usually have a long line of parents who waited till the last minute to register their kids for school, but even that was absent this year.

I didn't have any Science lab classes, they will start tomorrow, and the 3 classes that came to computer lab were very well behaved.

The IT technician came by and made sure all the computers were working properly for the Read 180 teacher, and the even the head of the technology dept. stopped in and asked if all our computers were working.

My principal said everything went so well she was worried we'd have a really bad day to even things out. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

All in all, we couldn't have asked for a better first day.

Texas Accountability Ratings Are Out

You can begin your search for your Texas school rating here.

My school received a rating of "Recognized", which is the 2nd highest rating. For more information about how schools are rated you can read the 2006 Accountability Manual.